It’s funny how our heart plays tricks on us. You think you have something, but the blinders are on, things aren’t so clear to you, and then it takes you months to finally realize you were better off all along. As I’ve said up front about this whole journey is that it started with a girl. I didn’t get the girl because I was overweight and because people judged and she listened and in return judged me instead of listen to her heart. But I got something in return…happiness, and that’s what this is about.
I’ve often believed that the best things come to you when you’re not looking for them and 14 weeks ago I started this wanting to shut myself off from the world, get to work, lose weight, and get the girl back. I was angry, I was bitter, and I didn’t understand why someone who claimed “you’re everything I’ve ever wanted in someone who I want to spend the rest of my life with” would do the things they did. If you make claims like that, you can’t back down…you lock that person up and you don’t take them for granted, don’t be selfish, and don’t worry what others think.
But today I realized, as shitty as it was, that whole scenario was one of the best things to happen to me. I’m 50 lbs lighter, I’ve made improvements in every aspect of my life, and guess what…I unexpectedly met a person who has far exceeded what I find the word beautiful and amazing to mean.
I cannot even begin to explain how happy I’ve been, no fighting, no petty bullshit, no lies, no hiding things, no trust issues…just someone I can be myself around and someone who is by my side through this journey….literally in the gym with me. Someone who has the guts to give me shit if I get off track and most importantly someone who has respect for themselves and that’s why she gives me respect in return.
Now, don’t get me wrong…I’m not in some serious relationship, I’m sticking to what I told myself I’d do and that’s just live life and enjoy what comes along. Am I claiming I met the love of my life, no. But guess what, I’m happier than I’ve been in the last year and it’s because of this person.
I guess all I can say is, don’t settle. Find something or someone that makes you forget the past. Begin again…but never give up, move on and live life to the fullest.
Is it wrong that it makes me kind of happy to know she’s in a shitty relationship because she chose someone who doesn’t care about her over me, maybe it is, but ya know what…some times people make stupid decisions and all you can do is forget about them and move on. Life isn’t fair or easy, just move on and never go back to the mistakes or past…..NEVER!
Hope everyone else has a beautiful rest of the day!
the guy with a big smile on his face today